A shorter introduction and quite possibly the beginning of Chapter one.

To begin with, it was very dark. This is not an excuse as to why things happened but simply fact. It was night, just after midnight I think, and the clouds hung low in the sky. It had rained earlier and now the air was...  moist.

In this dark moistness stumbled three darker shapes trying ever so hard to be quiet and failing. This was mostly due to the amount of wine consumed and the fact that is was dark. Very very dark. Did I mention being moist?

"I can't see a damned thing!"

"Shhh.."

"Ooof!"

"Stop stepping on me!"

"Sorry."

"SHHHHHHHHH!"

"...stop shhhh-ing us. It's annoying."

"...then shut the fuck up!" Do you want the pickets to hear us?"

"....ours... or the Austrians?"

a pause of sorts as the three shapes swayed in the dark

"... either. Ours mostly. The Austrians won't shoot us if they think we are deserting."

"They will just shoot us for being French."

"Well.... I'm not French, you know."

...

"Neither am I."

"Nor I, but I doubt that will matter since we are in the French army, wearing French uniforms, seeking out of a French camp..."

"We could tell them we are spies."

"Who? The Austrians?"

"...or the French."

The shapes thought about this for a moment.

"They shoot spies though, don't they."

"Yes."

"oh... yeah."

"How about we just shut the fuck up and not bump into them at all?"

"Who? The French?"

"...anyone."

"That would probably be for the best."

 and the shapes disappeared further into the dark.